Vice UK

WHO THE FUCK IS MADDOX?

Some IP dude who works at a telemarketing place and has a funny blog has written a book and everyone in the world wants one. His site gets millions of hits a month and the book was number one on Amazon for weeks! Even today it’s number 32. Why? Who the fuck is this guy? We don’t know. All we know is his popularity is 100% based on word of mouth and if our advertisers ever find out how few people care about ads these days we’re fucked!

CALLING ALL GIRLS

Our favorite food blog is done by a cute French girl named Clotilde who lives in Montmarte, Paris (if you ever go to Paris by the way just hover around Montmarte and Pigalle the whole time). She’s an ex web designer that switched over to the blog full time when she got her book deal. After noticing she used the Vice Guide to New York on a recent trip here we asked her to write for the food issue. She said no. That hurt like shit.
Photo from La Famille in Montmarte

NEW SITE

Vice has completely overhauled its website but Jesus maudite tabernak de chalice! Peut tu souce ma jambon gris sil te plait? Chrisse! Let’s get this straight: instead of eating the last issue and just shitting it on to the website we are going to put stuff up THE SECOND WE GET IT. Whether it’s in the issue or not. That means the website is going to have tons more shit on it than the magazine. For example, got a DO or a DON'T? Kabluie, it's online. At least three DOs & DON'Ts a day are going to be here. That's 90 a month you fucking cry babies! The magazine only has about 20. Same with articles. If the UK has a thing on British fry ups for the Food Issue we put on a condom and ram it into viceland right away. Shit, if any English speaking version of the magazine has something for the food issue we’re going to put it here. No more rooting around Vice Australia for their version. Instead of 20 Food articles like the magazine will have, the website is going to have, I don't know, a hundred? This is an explosive diarrhea of everything the magazine has and WAY MORE. Understand? Will you stop crying now?

NEW YORK - LESLEY ARFIN B-DAY

Lesley turned 27 today. It was hard seeing her because she looks so much like Harmony Korine it made us miss him. Where is that fucker anyways?

Lesley keeps busting our balls to put her Dear Diary site on our links. We keep forgetting about it because it has no pictures. Who likes things with no pictures? Anyway, she's such a psycho we had to listen to her.