NEW YORK - GO TO OUR FILM ISSUE PARTY TONIGHT (UPDATE!)

The party for our Film Issue is tonight and if it's anything like the one for our last theme issue, which was all about photographs and people who shoot them, you will want to lissen up. We are holding a special contest for which the winner won't have to wait in line to get in. Whoever emails to this here address the best interview question for this guy (click for more) will get their name on the guest list and thus be able to breeze past everyone else who is scowling and complaining and trying to pull some scam in order to jump ahead. Just to be on the safe side, since there will only be one winner, you should still RSVP here though. UPDATE: Winner announced below.

CHICAGO - AND THINGS ARE STILL LIKE THEY ARE IN THE SUBURBS

If you're tired of artsy "cinema of transgression" types and are a fan of lowbrow humor, shitty metal, idiots, boredom, and pain, here is a suggestion: watch this new movie called Human Garbage. It all takes place in Elgin, Illinois, where the crew of scumbags and self-hurters who made it have been for a fair share of their lives. Being an outsider, it's hard to tell why they're so proud of the place: This is the town to go to when you're 16 years old and want a tattoo, as long as you don't mind that a biker with Hep C and missing teeth is going to do it, it's going to look incredibly shitty, and some gangbanger will probably rob you afterward in the parking lot. 

CANADA - LULLABYE ARKESTRA RELEASE PARTY

Like intense, barebones rock but hate it when the band isn't married? Well, Vice Records just released Toronto husband and wife duo Lullabye Arketsra’s latest "Threats/Worship", and let me just say that we are all really stoked about the launch parties. I mean, have you seen these guys play live? Justin is a fucking beast and Kat's bass sounds like there are a million devil horns made of lead bees flying out of it at a million miles a second. We've been playing We Fuck the Night non-stop for the last week (one of our interns actually pulled something while pumping her fist in the air during the middle part). Check out the video, and then lurch menacingly towards any or all of their upcoming shows. Click below so you know where to go. 

SÃO PAULO - A SMELLY DRUNK

 Everyone knows that compulsive drunks swill whatever's around. For those occasions, perfume works great: it's generally free (a true alkie doesn't buy perfume, they steal it), it's less indigestible than rubbing alcohol, and they can give the impression that the addict is, in fact, a clean and well-kept person. But be assured it's not the color, the smell, or much less the cute little package that attracts the drunk, but actually the quantity of alcohol, a whopping 95 percent ethanol.

LONDON - ZOMBIES, MYSTERY WALLS, INAPPROPRIATE ACRONYMS, AND JAMIE TAETE

Because the recession hasn't affected people's budgets as much as you'd have thought, Scion flew me halfway around the world to attend the opening of the Los Angeles Vice Photo Issue 2009 exhibition. Yay!

AUSTRALIA - LET'S PLAY DRESS UPS

It's an indisputable fact that the dress up party is the king of all party genres because it lets people a) be creative, b) reference cool movies and album covers, or c) dress way more slutty than they ever would in real life. This something-for-everyone-ness almost always translates into a really fun night and sometimes, it even makes a strong case for party of the year status.

SYDNEY - ADIDAS JUST TURNED 60

Unlike turning the big six-oh as a human being (which we imagine must be something of a bummer), hitting your 60th year as a shoe brand is cool and renders you content in the knowledge that people have chosen to decorate their feet with you for six decades.

AUSTRALIA - COOL AID IS A WRAP

Well, our bushfire benefit gig on the weekend was a roaring success. Between the generosity of our friends and the witnessing of (for the first time in the history of the Vice party) people not bitching about having to pay for their drinks, it was sufficient to warm even the coldest and most cynical hearts here at Vice. Every single cent collected - right through from the firemen-delivered pizzas to the cookies sold at the market - was placed in the jar and a total, frustratingly close to 10K, was yesterday donated to the Red Cross.

AUSTRALIA - COOL AID LINE UP

Ok, this is a final reminder about our bushfire fundraiser benefit party this Sunday. All the details you need to get to the right place on time are in the flyer to your left.

All the bands and DJs will be playing at different times and to ensure that you don't miss out on your favourite, we've listed the specifics for you below.

MELBOURNE - FUN FOR FIRE

Along with our friends at ThreeThousand, we're throwing a party this coming Sunday at that bar which used to be dirty and called the Rob Roy but which is now clean and called something else. Playing live and DJing are Children Collide, Panel of Judges, members of Cut Copy and Eddy Current plus DJ Emillionz and the lads from Speak n Spell. There are also bound to be a number of unmentioned surprises given that we only began organising this roughly two seconds ago. All the money collected on the day will go to the Red Cross Bushfire Appeal and we'd really like to thank the Newtown Workers Club as well as all the bands, press and everyone else for helping out.

Details are:
Sunday 22nd Feb, 1 – 11PM
Newtown Workers Club
51 Brunswick St, Fitzroy