Uh-oh! We had a flood of questions for Ron after we advertised that the asker of each selected question would receive a free Hey Ron! t-shirt. Are you people really that easy to manipulate? We guess so, and that's why we'll be continuing the free t-shirt deal from here until we decide you don't deserve them. Speaking of manipulation, this week's dilemma involves a guy, the woman he wants to bone, and the conniving friend who snatched her snatch by claiming that his buddy had a virus that rhymes with "Slurpees."
I just found out my friend sold me down the river and got a chick to stop liking me because he liked her. He told her I had herpes so she wouldn't fuck me, and he ended up getting together with her instead. A week after the fact I ran into her at a bar and she told me she liked me but she wished I didn't have herpes. "What?!" I said. She told me the scoop and I hit the roof! I really liked this chick but my scumbag friend already hit it. What should I do? Do I still date her or do I knock my friend out for talkin' smack?
This is a straight-up knuckle-up situation. It doesn’t sound like he really knows her. He probably only saw her a couple of times and didn't really sit down and talk to her yet. But your "friend" straight-up played you. If he’s really your friend maybe then he doesn't look at you the same way because, you know, if was your friend he wouldn’t have done that.
If you think you can't take him, take him. I wouldn’t even say nothing to him. He definitely would know what's up once you punched him in the mouth. That’s the kind of thing you don’t speak about. You don’t walk up to him and say, “Yo man, I'm gonna punch you in the face. You did that, and it's wrong.” NO. I'm just going to walk up to you and punch you in the mouth, and directly in the mouth because I want your lip swollen so every time you look in the mirror and your lips move, you're not gonna even think about uttering those words again. Then he's going to look at his mouth as one big herpie. You know what I’m saying?
As far as dating her, guys don’t like dating other friends' girls cause their friend already hit it. But what about the girl you're dating now or the one you're going to be dating in the future? You can't think for a minute that she hasn't been hit all over the place already. It's just the way it is. If you can catch a virgin, she’s probably in the third grade.That’s the only place you're going find them, especially in public school.
When I was growing it up it was always "You want to meet a good girl? Then go to church." But nowadays you can probably find some of them hanging out in bars and clubs. So I would definitely check this girl out and see what she’s about if you're still into her. Just ask yourself this question before you sleep with her: “How long did it take for him to sleep with her?" Then you have to ask yourself if she's worthy of a relationship.
Spill your guts here, and if it's good enough you'll end up with a "Hey Ron!" t-shirt in your mailbox.