Just look obviously smooth, sexy, and childish, dance around for a bit and you can be a number one pop star in South Korea. Some hotshots will copy you some Timbaland productions and cover up your voice with some vocoders, so don’t worry about your lack of singing skills. In Korea, they like it slick. As a Dutchman living in Seoul, I'm pretending I'm a cultural anthropologist so I can justify to myself why, at this point, I can’t spend a day without K-Pop. Here are some top obsessions...
Super Junior
They’re smooth. So smooth they're putting “sorry” in the title to apologize to all the Western producers right away for ripping them off.
Son Dam Bi
Arousing, flirtatious, hot, inviting, kissable, libidinous, mature, provocative, racy, seductive, sensual, slinky, spicy, steamy, suggestive, titillating, voluptuous. That’s about all the synonyms I could find for sexy. That list was the only homework this girl needed to do, and she’s working it good. So good she forgot to lip-sync when she performed live on national television. But sexy: hell yes. Looking at her makes me feel very straight, dancing to this makes me feel very gay though. "Yes...no...which way to go?" Wait, Son Dam Bi… That makes sense.
Girls' Generation
In Korea you can be a pedophile without feeling any guilt about it. Child pornography is forbidden by law, but Girls Generation isn’t. These kids not only hit the Korean charts hard but also topped the charts in Thailand, and we all know why these girls got popular there. At least the Thai aren’t afraid to admit it. You could say Koreans are hypocrites, but actually they are cutely naive. Here girls with lollipops are just girls with lollipops. Really!
Big Bang
Shamelessly stealing from Justin Timberlake and getting loaded. Simple as that. To profile (read: market) themselves as a credible group, they love to say that they “write their own music.” The Koreans buy that shit, literally. But I’m happy that this video has subtitles (just forget it’s badly translated) so there is proof of their sophistication. And it actually is fascinatingly poetic, especially when you see the corresponding choreography. Your arm inside my body. Crack crack crack crack!
Big Bang feat. 2NE1
Why the hell am I trying to explain K-Pop? This video has everything that it stands for: making a lollipop the coolest motherfucking thing on earth. I’m speechless.
BAS VERBEEK
Best shit since the Teriyaki Boyz!
Posted by: Blasian Blaster | 29/04/2009 at 16:55
how many people are in the lollipop band? about half of korea? they are like a brutal acid trip mixed with the black eyed peas. seriously harsh.
Posted by: black eyed korees | 29/04/2009 at 16:59
I was fawning over Son Dam Bi and then... wait.. what is that? A phantom sideburn? Grody.
Posted by: Toby Keith's Uncle | 29/04/2009 at 17:01
wow these are awesome! at first i was all what the hell is this shit, but now im singing random sounding words that im making korean, this is going to be in my head all day now.
Posted by: pop poop | 29/04/2009 at 17:02
hahahah these totally made my day
Posted by: Alice | 29/04/2009 at 18:50
I especiarry rike the guy who goes clack clack clack clack.
Posted by: Kim-Jong Il | 29/04/2009 at 19:15
This makes Aquas Barbie girl seem like avantgarde pop mucic. I suggest you move home Dutch dude...
Posted by: Bali Shag | 29/04/2009 at 22:16
At least once a week I have a bitter argument with one of the little girls entrusted to my care. I point at one of the K-Pop stars bestickering their pencil case.
Me: "sexy girl"
Kid: "teeachuh no! Is boy. Big Bang. Handsome guy!"
Me: "nah. That is definitely a girl. Look how much makeup she's wearing."
Kid: "teeeachuh no! Is man. I love!" etc
Posted by: Anon-enonny-non | 30/04/2009 at 04:45
Those Super Junior boys are smoking hot. I could stare at them all day.
Posted by: Naomi | 30/04/2009 at 05:16
why is this so watchable... how does it go again...sorry sorry sorry nietzsche nietzsche nietzsche nietzsche n'yo?
Posted by: jerimiah | 30/04/2009 at 10:57
looks like koreans are never too proud to get down and dirty, it doesn't matter if they invented it, copied it or even exacerbated it to the point of bearableness. i enjoyed it. :P
Posted by: www.my-opinion.com | 30/04/2009 at 15:36
Haha ok, some clarification here: The Lollipop vid is TWO groups, a boyband (Big Bang) and a girl group (2NE1) that belong to the same management company. K-Pop is my guilty pleasure, T.O.P. be mah baby daddy, and why did you leave off the Wonder Girls? Don't tell me you favouritise. :P
I actually think these groups and their singles, while somewhat disposable, are much better than what most of Korea hails as "art" and "real music".
Posted by: Moped | 05/05/2009 at 12:21
yeah but what ever happened to Kim Jung Mi?
Posted by: cornelius | 07/05/2009 at 02:32
Best site about rock gas powered scooters
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Posted by: gas powered scooters | 11/06/2009 at 01:02
They are very beautiful and cute. Aside from their looks, they also have talents that made them famous now in all countries especially Philippines.
Posted by: The Philippine Island | 14/08/2009 at 20:38
this is the music genre par excellence, liked by young and old, has always been known as great exponents of music have emerged out of this genre, this is the case of the now defunct and loved by many MJ Jackson, Madonna, Britney Spears among others.
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