Well, besides the guy with the flamethrower torching tar on our roof right now, we thought we should bring to attention the new episode of From the Pages of Vice, about Jason Crombie’s experience with a sex machine you might know as a Segway and the ultimate in pretend-cock battle, the lightsaber. The words in today's featured story were not enough to fully explain how uncoordinatedly dorky and inappropriately kneaded with boink innuendo the whole thing was. There was the loud pop of a ping-pong paddle on a bum. There was mention of tit energy fueling the earth. Someone needed to pee. Just go watch it. Another thing that’s happening right now is a brand new Black Lips track with GZA (photo and embedded listening one click below) that's just sitting there on our server, waiting for your sweet ... wait. This is getting weird. That’s enough, we’re shutting the curtains now.