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Mer

It reminds me to IRC in 97

Anonymous

just tried it.

Stranger: hi
Stranger: asl?
You: hi
You: i do
Stranger: me too
You: awsome
Stranger: 13/f/cali
You: awsome. 42/m/pedo
You: with beard
Stranger: where’s pedo?
Stranger: what?
You: italy
Stranger: is it short for something
You: pedophilia
Stranger: oh ok
Stranger: Where is that in Italy?
You: near florence
You: do you know it?
Stranger: No ive never been
You: just noticed i put 42 lol
You: 22
Stranger: but my parents might take me when i turn 16
Stranger: really? are you cute?
You: very lol!
You: ask them to take you to pedophilia if you come
You: it’s beautiful
Stranger: ok ill ask them now
You: do

Anonymous

10 mins later:

Stranger: Sorry i’m not allowed to use the internet anymore. They said pedophilia was something bad and not a place.
Stranger: so bye i guess..

Conor

That’s absolutely fantastic, Anonymous.

ADHD

I concur, that was gold Anonymous.

bolt

i'll tell you another quick way to a bloody penis- walking into a new friends house and them forgetting to mention they have an extremely protective pit bull. thanks, seth!

kool kuntz

If you like fucked up on-line social networks, you'll love camfrog!!!!

peeshead

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: wassup
You: hello stranger
Stranger: hi
Stranger: where are you from ?
You: i like your uRbAn greeting
You: london
Stranger: ooh nice
You: you?
Stranger: i'm from sao paulo - brazil , and just to say , i adore o tv serie from uk called skins
You: i don't

You have disconnected.

Anony

: D
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: cunt
You: i was going to say fag first
Stranger: oh well
You: but you beat me to the punch
Stranger: cunt
You: eh, fag
You: im posting this on a blog so say something revolting
Stranger: IM GONNA EAT YOUR FUCKING INTESTINEs
Stranger: will that do?
You: perfect
Stranger: link2blog
You: uhmmm...
You: nahhh
Stranger: yeah, a bullshitter
Stranger: so
Stranger: ill rephrase
Stranger: cunt
You: ttfn

killerparty

Stranger: what's your middle name
You: ronald
Stranger: nice
Stranger: hi ronald
You: cool
Stranger: whats up
You: eating taco bell
Stranger: what'd you order?
You: #8
Stranger: is that a gordita?
You: nah, its just 3 hard tacos
Stranger: oh
Stranger: im a fan of the hard taco
Stranger: underappreciated
You: cool. are you a fan of the hard schlong
Stranger: im a double decker taco supreme + guacamole girl
Stranger: bye ronald :(

JINGO DILLYDALLY EGGARS

Stranger: what's up?
You: my dick
Stranger: oh?
You: yeah
You: whats up with you?
Stranger: wishing i had one
You: oh you must be on your period
Stranger: no I don't have those
Stranger: at least not yet
You: oh god
You: a child
Stranger: something wrong with that?
You: why are you talking to strangers
You: didn't your parents tell you not to talk to strangers
Stranger: because I have nothing better to do....and no they never did
Stranger: i think daddy was too busy putting himself in me
You: i'm calling interpol or child services or something
You: then masturbating

Anony

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: ohai
Stranger: Hi
You: howz it goin
Stranger: Everything's cool
Stranger: you?
You: right on
You: err thangs good
You: what are you up to?
Stranger: nice
Stranger: omegle
You: obvi, who isn't?
Stranger: you?
Stranger: lulz
You: omegle
You: and VICE
Stranger: where u from?
You: canada
You: yourself?
Stranger: brazil
You: right on
You: what did you have for lunch?
Stranger: VICE, the emulator?
You: uhm, sure
Stranger: i had rice, beans and meat
Stranger: you?
You: no, im reading this article on Omegle
Stranger: ok
You: I had a roast ham and provalone sandwitch with keen's hot mustard
You: and a banana
Stranger: you made me hungry
You: thank you
You: what is your speciality?
You: and or profeshun
Stranger: I strictly specialize myself in doing absolutely nothing
You: thats impossible
You: you know that
Stranger: Ok, I breathe
Stranger: Actually, I'm a law student
You: and proform other nessecary bodily functions
You: right on
You: im a pharmacy student
You: if that makes sense
Stranger: that's nice
Stranger: it does
Stranger: careful with your computer tomorrow
You: i will be professionally assisting the despesion of clients medications
You: why is that?
Stranger: they say there's a virus that will infect millions of computers tomorrow
Stranger: Conficker
You: well thats debatable
Stranger: very debatable
Stranger: but you never know
You: like tupac is dead debatable
Stranger: he ain't dead
Stranger: he lives right here in Rio
You: ahah
You: awysome
You: how did you hear of Omegle?
Stranger: i saw it n a BBS
You: BBS....?
Stranger: forum
You: oh
Stranger: tomorrow is April 1st
You: any thoughts on what you are going to do?
Stranger: i have to behave myself every single day... so i'm gonna put it all out and raise hell tomorrow
You: nice...
You: i was thinking of something public
Stranger: like what
You: like... Obama assassinated
Stranger: ?
Stranger: yeah, that would be something
Connection imploded.

new england's finest men

"would you rather shit on a casio or play NASCAR monopoly?"

First and most important question.

new england's finest men

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hello
You: shit on a casio or play nascar monopoly?
Stranger: Depends, who owns the Casio?
You: moby
Stranger: I'll go with that then
Stranger: Any reason to spread some doo-doo butter
You: what if merle haggard owned nascar monopoly then?
You: haha good point
You: beatles or stones?
Stranger: Beatles, for sure.
You: gay
Stranger: Pfft, what's the Stones got over Beatles?
You: rock music
Stranger: oh no, you have me there
You: beatles were liberal wankers who wanted to change the world
You: stones just wanted to rock
You: they didn't give a fuck, nobody thinks jagger is a good person
Stranger: All I know is Beatles got high and wrote Come Together which is good enough reason for me
You: obama or bush?
Stranger: Obama
You: FDR or lincoln?
Stranger: Lincoln
You: they were both tyrants
You: bush had read tom wolfe
Stranger: Tom Wolfe?
You: obama won't release his grades from colombia
You: yeah tom wolfe is cool
You: i'm not really a rightist, i just like pretending
Stranger: I can dig it
You: read tom wolfe
You have disconnected

Droople Gilhooly

ITS ALL BRAZILIANS AND POLACKS

Samuel

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi there
You: hey, are you into cucumber pie?
Stranger: dunoo
You: feel like some fresh rape
Stranger: ooh nice
You: hot molestation
Stranger: tight rough and hard
You: do you want to send me semen?
You: put it on bread though
Stranger: yeah why not, got enough of it
You: yum
You: i will eat it on webcam and you can watch
Stranger: that would be nice
You: are you erectile?
Stranger: very
You: i wish i could bite on your penis
You: and rip it off
You: so the blood squirts everywhere
You: like a fountain
You: or AIDS
You: and semen
Stranger: u may eat all
You: YUMTASTIK
Stranger: as long as u moan
You: you must gag me with your throbster.
Stranger: i love that, can i also hit your nutts with my fists?
You: hot. do you like boiz too?
Stranger: i like all people as long as they are hot, rough en filthy

anonymous

HA! This is going to be the source of so much excellent internet humor

alecrf

this is like weird irc but better. i now know my new source of entertainment

jim pole

i am trying to contain a full arsenal of lauhter right now and it is very difficult. bloody penises almost put me over the edge.

Bill Paxton

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: I love chocolate
You: i love ticklin scrotums
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Bradford

Kids these days - they just want to shoot their loads without any cyber-foreplay.

rocco sifreddi

back in my day it took weeks of talking on message boards before you could even get a hint of cyber sex

DINO FUNTIME

You: why is my face so horribly mutated
Stranger: i found the coins
You: you did?!
You: oh fuck
Stranger: they were in your face
You: i need them for the vagina machine
Stranger: you need the face coins for your vagina machine?
You: ah great, you saved me money on plastic surgery
Stranger: no worries.
You: yes, i need the face coins for the vagina machine so that i could go home to candyland

choco_dreamz

You: you into little green monsters?
Stranger: does AP stand for anal penetration
You: i thought it stood for angular pooping
You: i guess not
You: listen, are you into little green monsters
You: cause im into jurrasic park
Stranger: o yea probley
You: and i think we'd get it on really nicely
Stranger: o ya we would
You: my green pointshag is so hard right now
Stranger: i am a fan of little green monsters
You: come on you big sexy dino shove your cock into my lopsoiq
You: do it
You: NOW
You: ohhhhhhhhh fuuuuuucKKKKKKKK
Stranger: IM DOING IT!!!
You: OH MY GOD
Stranger: O YEA!!!
You: OH SHIT
Stranger: its nice
You: ITS RIPPING
You: ITS FUCKING RIPPING
Stranger: AHHHH
Stranger: holy shit
You: OH MY GOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDD

You: 2 BIG2BIG
Stranger: its ok
You: AH SHIT ITS BLEEDING EVERYWHERE
You: OH FUCK
You: GET THE ELMERS

You: GET THE FUCKING ELMERS!!!!
Stranger: DONT WORRY ITS ALMOST DONE
You: SHOOT THE GLUE IN MY LOIPSOQ
Stranger: I AINT FUCKIN GOT ANY
You: SHOOT IT
Stranger: O SHIT
You: SHOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTT
Stranger: O SHIT
You: OH FUCK!!!!!!!!
Stranger: O SHIT
You: OH FUCK!!!!!
You: CUNT MOTHER FUCKER!!!!
You: oh god damn that was nasty
Stranger: that was so nice
You: your dino cock is fucking powerful
You: when can we meet again?
Stranger: it is it is
Stranger: mos def we can meet again
You: the park @ 10?
Stranger: sounds good
Stranger: see you there
You: hot.

mos def not yours

oh no, i just spent like an hour on there talking to some Finnish guy, then i ended up giving him my email. that was dumb. now he thinks i'm his girlfriend. he said that no one in Finland smokes weed, WTF!

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